App of the week: Dungeon Hunter 3

Well I never saw this coming – I have chosen an Android app of the week. If you have read some of my earlier articles, you will be as surprised as I am. The reason for this is that my mum got an award-winning Android tablet and, me being me, I had to play with it the second I came home from school and, having been using it for the last few hours I was inspired to do an Android AOTW. So here it is: This weeks Android AOTW it Dungeon Hunter 3.

This is the best android game I have played so far, but admittedly I haven’t played a lot, and I wish that it were available on more platforms. When you start playing the game, you have to chose between four different classes, each one with different strengths and weaknesses. I personally chose the warlord as I always chose the tank class, but you can also chose from the astromancer, trickster and the shaman. Once you choose your class you are then given a quick tutorial, showing you how to both play and upgrade you character. Once completed, you are then free to kill and maim to your hearts contempt.

The gameplay is very detailed, with each kill giving you both money and experience, slowly helping you to buy countless upgrades and items to help your character on their way to becoming invincible, but, for those more inpatient people out there, each level and mission comes with three additional goals that, when completed, give you a large boost to both gold and XP.  The game is easy to get the hang of, with the tutorial teaching you know all you need to know, but having played it for about two hours I can tell that completing it and fully upgrading your character is no mean feat. It will take countless hours of gameplay.

Dungeon Hunter 3, iOS and Android, Free
Download from Google Play or the App Store

No matter how hard I try, I can’t stop hating Microsoft

The title of this article is a little misleading, as those of you who read my posts, follow me on Twitter or know me in person will know that I love Microsoft. Windows Phone is my phone platform of choice, I would never consider using anything but a Windows computer, and the thing that I want most in the world right now is a 15.6″ one of these. But even with all the love I bear for the love-child of Ballmer and Gates, there are a large number of things about them which annoy me.

The first and foremost of these annoyances is with Zune. As a Windows Phone user, I am forced to use Zune in order to update, add music and video to and do a large number of other things to, my phone. This is fine, I can add and take away music to and from my phone quickly and easily, and updates will automatically commence if they are available. But when I got my HP Pavilion dv7 with Beats Audio, I began to play music through my laptop, whereas previously I had been using speakers connected to my phone. It soon dawned upon me that Zune, a beautiful piece of software, is one of the buggiest pieces of crap since Windows Media Player. Quite often while playing music, the song will randomly pause, move to a different point or just skip altogether, and on occasion I have closed Zune to find that the song that was playing doesn’t stop playing, much to my teacher’s dismay. When this is Skrillex, chemistry lessons can be quite awkward. What the hell is up with that? A company whom incorporated software into its very name can’t be bothered or is unable to iron out the bugs in their music software. Even iTunes, something which is essentially designed to work on a different operating system and much maligned on Windows, is nowhere near as buggy. This being said, with the Zune name being dumped, and the software being incorporated into the OS, I surely hope that for Windows 8’s sake that at least some of the bigger glitches will be ironed out.

And secondly, what is the point in Windows Media Player any more? The whole thing is utter crap and nobody in their right mind would ever use it. I mean seriously, software that causes computers to blue-screen (I speak through personal experience) through use is not right in any way. And if any person out there does use this utter piece of crap, please explain to me in the comments below why you would put yourself through it. Please.

My final point is the most obvious one. Internet Explorer. This is in every way the single most hated piece of software out there. It is crap, it crashes, freezes and is only there for sane people to download either Firefox or Chrome. And, to make matters worse, you have to have specific permission from Microsoft to be able to uninstall the software. Of course, you can do what both I and Xavier (our EIC) have done and bury it deep within our program files, but it will always be there, taunting you with the possibility that you may one day, have to use it.

So those are the main reasons that Microsoft pisses off even myself, a true Microsoft fanboy. Despite the wonders of things like the Arc Touch Mouse, SkyDrive and Windows Phone, Microsoft isn’t perfect, but by ironing out the bugs and listening to consumers, they could get pretty close.

Things That Should Exist: Propeller Shoes

Things That Should Exist is a column by James Trickey. Things suggested are not always good ideas.

This week we move onto a completely different genre of object, that is if objects have genres, and by genre I mean type of object. You know, like on iTunes for example, clothing, toys and equipment can then be subdivided into sub-genres such as shoes, stationary and underwater equipment, providing a neat segue to the world of propeller shoes.

Let me make something clear. These are designed for underwater use only, which is why the underwater equipment brought me nicely to the topic, in case you hadn’t realised. I am not suggesting that there should be shoes that can allow you to fly because that would be preposterous (unlike all my other suggestions). These are for people who need to get places quick and have to travel via a large body of water.

This includes people who are trying to illegally trying to swim from some obscure Asian country over to England as they weren’t allowed to go by plane, and to be honest it would’ve made my job a whole lot easier because, in case you didn’t know, I am not supposed to be in this country right now.

You see, I was very tired after my long journey but this has would have made it a walk in the park as opposed to a swim across the ocean.

These shoes would of course be waterproof and, don’t ask me how, but they would be powered by some form of electricity. The shoes would have little propellers on the soles which, after being turned on, would propel you along the water at high speeds. It also means that, as human beings, we would be able to be even more lazy than we are now by removing another aspect of exercise and replacing it with technology.

To give you an idea of what these shoes would look like I have produced a picture in Paint for your benefit. Digixav can’t afford Photoshop.

And I know it’s crap but I just hope you can all appreciate that the white parts on the shoe are the propellers and they are helping him/her to swim along. If not then you can go and stand in a bin long enough that your legs get smelly and tired.

So that’s about it once again, and I hope that you can enjoy your lives every bit as much if not more after reading this than you did before.

HADOUKEN!!

Nokia uploads (and pulls) Rack City parody developer advert

Nokia‘s not a company to shy away from a bit of viral marketing, but releasing a parody video of the horrendous Rack City by Tyga might be taking the advertisement of Windows Phone development a bit too far. Having been uploaded by Nokia to YouTube, TechCrunch reports that the video was pulled, but we found a copy on Vimeo and downloaded it to reupload if necessary. It’s Dev City bitch!

Lyrics and description courtesy of My Nokia Blog:

Bringing cool to coding. Mobile devices are cool. Mobile apps are cool. Mobile Developers are about to get cooler. Nokia Developer is turning towns into Dev Cities with its Ready.Set () {Code} Challenge. We are hitting 13-cities looking for developers who want to build an experience not just another app. Developers who build the coolest, baddest apps for the Windows Phone platform and Nokia Lumia devices earn devices & prizes. Sign up for a Challenge near you: http://www.nokiadeveloper.eventbrite.com/

LYRICS
dev, dev, city kid, city kid
dev, dev, dev city kid, city kid, dev
dev, dev, dev city kid, city kid
Mutha on the beat

Hah!
[Verse 1:] – Smixx
dev city kid, dev, dev city kid
ten ten ten twenties and we flippin’ bits
100 deep coding hard no guest list
Nokias who we’re messin wit
Got my other bits messin’ with my other bits
Codin’ all night figure we ain’t ready yet
Make it work too dope I ain’t selling it
Decoder’s fresher than another stick a peppermint
Dope sweater we the first kings killin this
Young money young money gettin’ bounty rich
We got that Metro on this ish

you know what it is
[Chorus:] – Smixx (Cory)
dev city kid, dev, dev city kid
dev city kid, dev, dev city kid
dev city kid, dev, dev city kid
ten ten ten twenties and we flippin’ bits 

dev city kid, dev, dev city kid
dev city kid, dev, dev city kid
dev city kid, dev, dev city kid
Been codin’ since a youngin now I’m gettin’ rich
[Verse 2:] – The Product (Christian)
I’m a money makin’ star
buy the club rounds on my card
Got the sick rims on my brand new car…
y’all dev’s get out walk the boulevard

I get my apps done pronto
Push it in the mornin’ and I’m gonzo
Hanchos gonna make it rain buy a poncho
You ain’t gettin’ money made but you want dough

Head phones on tilt seat back
Steady codin’ on it keys get tapped
lovin’ this platform, some too packed
d/l numbers going up like gas

Hot damn pull away from the pack
Localized it so I’m big in japan
Tat t-t-t-tatted up gettin stacks

Steve Balma love’s me
you know how it is

[Chorus:] – The Product (Christian)
dev city kid, dev, dev city kid
dev city kid, dev, dev city kid
dev city kid, dev, dev city kid
hacking code on them apps and I’m getting cheques

dev city kid, dev, dev city kid
dev city kid, dev, dev city kid
dev city kid, dev, dev city kid
ten ten ten twenties and them fifties Smixx

[Verse 3:] – Smixx (Cory)
I want a lumia in my pocket
so I’m ready to win
I choose to rocket
and not just contend
I see the leaderboard 
and want my name at the top
just to know that I brought it
to know I’ve still got it
that I’ve snagged my reward
and man I’m not bored
when I’m out for blood
and I’m going in hard
I want to build an experience
not just another app
this whole mobile thing
is not just another fad

Nine hunnids, hunnids
Nine hunnids, hunnids
Nine hunnids, hunnids
Nine hunnids, hunnids

Flipboard heads to Android via XDA and becomes our app of the week – again

Flipboard, last year’s runner-up for Best App in the Digixav Awards, is on its way to Android with exclusivity to Samsung’s flagship Galaxy S III, but one XDA member has got the .apk for anyone with Android 2.2 or later to download and enjoy, regardless of device. This makes it a worthy app of the week – again.

Flipboard, Android, Free
Download from XDA or visit the website

Xavier Voigt-Hill's avatarDigixav

This week’s app of the week is Flipboard.

Flipboard is a fantastic app that lets you add whatever content you desire to a virtual ‘social magazine’. Complete with Facebook and Twitter integration, it is more than a conventional RSS reader as it corroborates your social feeds and go-to websites in one place with a beautiful flipping interface. A free account will sync your feeds across devices, and a recent update allowed the app to work on iPhone and iPod touch. Take a look at what Flipboard themselves have to say about it in the video below.

Flipboard is now my only source for news and social updates. The app is free and gloriously ad-free and I would recommend it to anyone with an iDevice. Even Apple love it, having made it their iPad app of the year. It might also be in the running for a more prestigious award from a

View original post 16 more words

Technophobia: Orwell was 28 years too early

Technophobia is a column by James Hardy. Views expressed are not necessarily those of Digixav.

Welcome to China everybody! Yep, renowned file-sharing site The Pirate Bay is being blocked in the UK by five of Britain’s biggest internet service providers: O2, Virgin Media, Sky, TalkTalk and Everything Everywhere (aka T-Mobile and Orange or T-Morange). BT requested ‘a couple more weeks’ before announcing their position on blocking the website, but they are under no obligation to do so.

I can’t help but think that this is the beginning of a slippery slope. The government won’t know when to stop. They’ll block all file sharing sites, websites which have links to them, any search engines through which you can access these sites and, while they’re at it, why don’t they just block any anti-government websites? Oh snap, they just killed free speech!

They say that these sites take millions of pounds from the entertainment industry, but the truth is the money the industry loses is minimal. I download American TV shows from file sharing sites. Why? Because I can’t get them here in the UK. Show them over here, get more views, get more money from advertising, everyone wins. Simples.

Often the reason people download games from these websites is because they come out earlier in the US. People want things ASAP. Say a game is released in the US two weeks before Europe, and someone across the pond uploads to The Pirate Bay. So, if you live in the UK, you can have it now, or you can wait a fortnight to get it. I wonder what you’re going to choose? The same goes for films and music – release at the same time around the world and more people will pay for them. Fact.

The movies I download from file sharing sites are ones I wouldn’t go to the cinema to see. They’re ones I would wait to see on TV. I’m going to see The Avengers in the cinema because it’s going to be awesome. If I can be bothered, I might even write a review on STR. But other movies, ones which tend to get a resounding ‘meh’ from critics, I would download. So, film industry: make good movies and I will pay to see them. Cinemas are overpriced, too. It can cost me £20 for a movie and some popcorn. That’s too much.

The entertainment industry needs to get with the times. Services like iTunes, Netflix and Spotify are doing brilliantly for themselves. That is what the people want. Whatever they want, wherever they want, whenever they want. The entertainment industry wants you to go to a real shop and buy a DVD. Sad though it is, human beings are lazy. They don’t want to do that. The entertainment industry needs to make things downloadable. Why not have file sharing sites where you have to pay some money which the industry gets to download something? Everyone wins.

Blocking The Pirate Bay won’t work. People will use things like proxies, *insert more technological terms here* etc. to get round it. And blocking it will just mean more sites like it will appear. It isn’t the answer.

File sharing sites aren’t losing the entertainment industry money. It’s bringing about its own downfall.

Another news story that came out last month was that of the government introducing a new law so they can monitor our email, phone and web use. Whenever they feel like it. Just like that. Which, according to the Home Office, will be used to tackle crime and terrorism. Of course. It’s interesting to note that Labour tried to introduce similar plans when they were last in power, but they failed due to massive opposition to the proposals, mainly from the Tories. But it’s fine now they’re in power, erm, why exactly, Mr Cameron?

The government will be able to look at any website you’ve visited, group you’re in contact with or email, text or phone call you have made from the last two years. Without needing permission from anyone. And to those people who make the ‘I have nothing to hide’ argument, you are unbelievably naïve. Would you want someone to be able to open your post and reseal it? I think not.

So while the government criticises China, Iran and other countries with similar regimes for taking similar measures, they do exactly the same back here. That’s fair. At this rate, it won’t be long before they control exactly what we can and can’t do with the internet. They’re not far away from controlling our thoughts.

Anyway, seeing as how the government could block this site if they wanted to, it probably wouldn’t be a good idea to call them lying, hypocritical bastards. Turns out George Orwell predicted what was to come pretty damn well.

Enjoy the future, people!

This article was originally published on Stuff Things Rants

Birdwatching: How social networking can (stupidly) ruin your life

Birdwatching is a column by Eddie King. Views expressed are not necessarily those of Digixav.

My first post may have been a little limp wristed so far as rants go, but, when checking the news, I sometimes get the unexplainable urge to shout at the authors of some of the UK’s worst articles. So, despite it being rather late, I have to alert all of you to how intelligent we really are. because if the level of intelligence required to be a technology journalist amounts to this particular article, then we must all be bloody geniuses and shouldn’t have any problem in taking over the world when we are older. Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the first of many social networking rants.

I do hope you will take the time to read the article from MSN in full but my attention was drawn by an example about half way through about a man who was sacked from two jobs and fined £1000 for a single tweet. The article in question was entitled “how social networking can ruin your life” and it was basically stoking the anti-Facebook fire and bringing up some real world examples of the effects of being normal in the twenty-first century. First off. I need to protest at the principle that a single phrase comprising of less than 140 characters can cause such a stir as to turn a good man’s life into living hell. At the moment we are fighting several wars and are in the middle of social unrest and confusion on a scale that has never been imagined before due to the world getting smaller, what with racial, sexist and ageist (yes, it exists) abuse and having to live our lives around the idiots who invented health and safety. You really expect me to believe that anybody gives a rat’s fart about some guy complaining about delays at a small airport I didn’t even know existed? It is an outrage.

But now we must discuss the statement at hand. After delays at Robin Hood Airport, a man tweeted about blowing the place sky high in frustration. He was the sued for bomb threats and charged with sending a message that was “grossly offensive or of an indecent, obscene or menacing character” and sacked from his jobs over the scandal.

Crap! Robin Hood airport is closed. You’ve got a week and a bit to get your shit together otherwise I’m blowing the airport sky high!!

Generally I do not approve of text speak in written work but I think just such an abbreviation sums up the incident very nicely, that abbreviation being WTF‽ Words don’t even begin to describe how stupid this really is. If the guy really were intent on blowing stuff up, do you really think he would put it on Twitter? And even if he did, he was charged a week later so if he was a terrorist then he could have blown old Robin Hood Airport and many others “sky high” before he was sent a letter asking him to rephrase his annoyance.

I completely understand the government’s need to censor and watch social networking sites and what is being written on them, but the airport didn’t get bombed and the man had no history. It just seems like a case of finding a reason to prove an innocent man guilty and this is unacceptable – almost as bad as the man who went to jail for commenting on the on-pitch heart attack of Bolton Wanderers player Fabrice Muamba. I do not follow the Bolton Wanderers every move intently, and so I only heard about what happened in passing, but it did occur to me that the chances of a young football player who is in peak physical condition having a heart attack and being taken to intensive care were pretty slim. Now, imagine an avid fan who is 21 and is studying biology at university. The worst part of this story, however, is that he was sent away for racial abuse. Racial abuse? Because of a heart attack? The charge is just wrong. There are plenty of horrid people out there but sending a guy away to jail for being a hater and then blaming it on him being a racist is just a little extreme in my eyes.

There were some valid ones too where various illicit pictures were involved but, to be honest, on a computer you always have the off button whereas in real life a lot more can happen with far worse consequences. I think people should stop wasting their time trying to teach people how they should think and accept that as long as they aren’t breaking the law they should be allowed to live however they want. And what is more, they should stop trying to blame it on social networking. And for God’s sake, stop writing annoying, sissy, health and safety clad, nanny state, cheap, badly written articles about it because it is very late now and every time you do, I have to devote some minutes of my life pointing out to the rest of the world how stupid you are.

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aliqudsi's avatarAli Gone Mobile

So we’ve all heard of the Lumia 900s connection problems and the amazing lengths Nokia has gone to correct them- issuing what is possibly one of the fastest updates in history (less than 4 days) and having it pushed out by At&t to all phones is no simple task (Carriers usually delay updates FOREVER! – if anything this is a sign of how deeply At&t are committed to the Lumia 900s success).

What surprised me most was that in most of the comments I’ve read (on the verge, engadget, Cnet and many more) were surprisingly positive; besides the usual “NOKIA IS THE DEVIL DOWN WITH ELOP! BRING US THE McRIB!” most of the commenters seemed overly impressed with the speed and swiftness that Nokia dealt with this problem (of course $100 of credit doesn’t hurt).

Some commenters were even sarcastically suggesting that the bug was left on purpose just…

View original post 192 more words

Things That Should Exist: The Instant Insult Machine

Things That Should Exist is a column by James Trickey. Things suggested are not always good ideas.

Firstly, shut up. This idea may sound stupid but I can completely reassure you that it is in fact 100% pointless, unneeded, antisocial and probably stupid, but, since I said it first, you can take that and shove it somewhere where I’m not looking.

Secondly, this idea may or may not already exist but I don’t care.

And thirdly, here are some fire extinguishers for your own sick amusement.

Onto the subject for today which is, as you might have guessed, an incredible device that allows you to instantly insult your best friends at merely the touch of a button. I know – awesome. As I’ve  clearly stated in the paragraph beginning with ‘secondly’, this may already exist. but this is my own take and what I want my Instasult machine to do.

I’m certain you have (so certain you wouldn’t believe, in fact) that you have accidentally got yourself into an argument that you just can’t be bothered to fight for anymore. This is where the magic happens. Because you’re so damn bored of this person, you can whip out this small (or large) box/tortoise-shaped robot and, at the press of a button, have his mum called fat for some reason.

BAYM!! He feels sad and depressed and you’ve got that smug grin on your face because after the insult the whole crowd went “OOOooooo….R U GONNA TAKE THAT FAM?!?!” and in the end he cannot come up with anything to beat it. These insults would be downloaded at your own pleasure and I’m thinking that an app would be able to send new insult to the machine via your mobile device or such like.

Also, think of the advertising potential. I won’t go into detail, but you can imagine some happy clappy man presenting a machine that AUTOMATICALLY INSULTS YOUR FRIENDS. Sorry for the caps lock, but I just wanted my point to get across one last time.

And, once again, I bid you farewell for another week as I leave to go and do something better, more constructive and that might actually give me some sort of pleasure in my life.

Insert sound from typical comic book here.

Header image from spinningpixels