I have 122 friends on Facebook and this is why

The majority of people I know on Facebook have way over 400 friends. This is ridiculous. I know that the average person will not care about half of his/her ‘friends’ posts, comments and statuses. So why have them? Does it seem cool to have a load of people you could possibly speak to if you ever might need them? Or do you just add people for the sake of adding them?

Facebook now lets you rate your friends too. By default you have groups for your work colleagues, local friends, acquaintances and school friends and you can make even more if you desire. If these people are really your friends, is it really fair to rate them? Do any fall into the acquaintance category, and if yes, then why are they labelled as a Facebook ‘friend’? Maybe it’s just me, but this whole thing seems really messed up.

Also I think accepting people you don’t properly know is actually quite dangerous. I’m not saying that they’re going to steal your identity and spend all your money, but the more ‘friends’ you have that aren’t your friends, the more you are open to different forms of cyberbullying and online threats. About a year ago I would have never have thought of this but on my old Facebook account I saw some pretty nasty comments that really upset people. Behind a screen people are brave.

I must say that I have so far been through two different Facebook accounts. On the first I had nearly 600 friends, but on my new one I have just 122. When browsing the old one, I used to get so much random crap appearing in my news feed that I did not care about at all. Now I only see what is relevant to me and the people that I care about. Of course I accept the fact that a few people will be the exception, and will actually speak properly to every 400th person they have as a friend, but do you?

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The Winklevii become venture capitalists

Cameron and Tyler Winklevoss, the twins who claim they invented Facebook, won $200,000,000 from Mark Zuckerberg in court and now want 4 times more, are now venture capitalists, and Paul Carr of PandoDaily isn’t too happy about it. In other news, if you want money, I am now a VC. Introducing Fundxav.

The noise you hear is the death rattle of any meaning behind the notion of being a VC

Facebook launches ad campaign across Google’s AdSense network

Not one of the 850 million? Mark Zuckerberg will keep hunting you down, as Facebook just launched an ad campaign across Google’s AdSense network. As if there aren’t enough people who waste their lives feeding the advertisers

Facebook IPO filing crashes the SEC website

Facebook has filed for its IPO, and crashed the website of the Securities and Exchange Commision. The filing explains that the site has over 483 million daily users and made a profit of $1bn last year. Madness? I think so. I would buy shares, but I’m not a multi-billionaire like Zuck.

The Poll: What should Facebook’s stock symbol be?

Facebook is expected to finally go public this week, with an expected IPO of up to $100,000,000,000. While this isn’t really news in itself, the imminence of the big day has led many people to ponder as to what the stock symbol of Zuckerberg’s baby will be. We have compiled a short list of likely candidates, but feel free to suggest your own in the poll below.

PS: FACE is already taken by Physicians Formula Holdings, Inc., but they are only valued at $40,818,000. If Zuckerberg wanted their symbol, he could just reach into his pocket and come out with a cosmetics company, so we aren’t ruling that out just yet.

Angry Birds to win your Facebook hearts on Valentine’s Day

Rovio have announced that Angry Birds, our runner-up for Best App of 2011, will launch on Facebook on February 14th (aka Valentine’s Day) having already conquered every other platform under the sun. In the announcement that Time said was sure to kill office productivity, founder Peter Vesterbacka explained that the game would be free to play, but with premium content such as the Mighty Eagle available for the 40% of users who are expected to be willing to pay for such madness. Leaderboards will also find their way on to the Facebook version, cueing mass bird-flinging wars in the Digixav offices.

How will you spend your Valentine’s Day this year? Crushing pigs or with that special someone? Watch the video below to get a teaser of the game and then make a decision. Just don’t forget how angry these birds can get.

Technophobia: Stop changing Facebook!

Technophobia is a column by James Hardy. Views expressed are not necessarily those of Digixav.

So now, apparently, we have to make a timeline of our lives on Facebook. Well no, Mark Zuckerberg, contrary to your belief, most people that use Facebook don’t spend their whole lives on it. Yes, there may be a select few that do in fact have Facebook as their home page, and spend ten hours each day constantly refreshing their news feed waiting for one of their nine hundred friends to write some bullshit about their ex.

Which brings me onto another point: Facebook statuses. Only post statuses which most of your friends will be able to understand. These are genuine examples from some of my Facebook friends.

OMG that was actually soo funny hahahahaha
Why waste your breath apologising? #Idiot.
You couldn’t trust him but you never said no.
Fucking twat. Why would u do that?
Ur 2 good 4 him hun. Dont take his shit.

Really? Maybe to two or three of your friends these will make perfect sense. Who knows, you could be a comical genius. But 95% of your friends will have no clue as to what is going on. Don’t bother. Save your breath.
Don’t get arthritis. Just text the friends that will understand!

This leads (sort of) on to my next point. Facebook ‘friends’. I think I have added perhaps a dozen people on Facebook. Everyone else has added me. Because to be honest, I can’t be arsed. I don’t use facebook all that much, at least not compared to some. I have 200 friends. This is a tiny amount compared to most of my friends. I kid you not, the person who wrote the first status above has over 1000 friends. One thousand friends! That is quite frankly, ridiculous. Nobody knows a thousand proper friends. It is just a lie. If I meet someone while on holiday in Mongolia for a few minutes, and add them on Facebook, they are not my friend. Life doesn’t work like that! Having thousands of Facebook friends doesn’t necessarily make you popular.

In that respect, I like Google+. They have circles set up for acquaintances, friends and family. And really, most of your facebook friends would should go in acquaintances. You could have 1000 acquaintances. You don’t have 1000 friends.

Note: That was sort of bullshit. I don’t even use Google+. I just know they have acquaintances.

Anyhoo, back to the main point. I have looked at someone’s profile with the timeline thing. It is confusing! As human beings, we do not like change. That is a fact. So if, Mark Zuckerberg, you change Facebook every month, people are going to be pissed off. Stop doing it!

And finally, to people who aren’t on Facebook. I don’t think that you are some strange, messed up people. I salute you. You are the black sheep. You have resisted Mark Zuckerberg’s attempts to get the whole world on Facebook.

Unlike the rest of us. The Zuckerzombies.

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